True greatness is truly achieved that when everything is through a person still remains true

Even though this blog started off as a school project, I have decided to transform this space into a journal where I can attempt to process events in my life and pull some sort of lesson from them.  Let's see how this goes...

I swear that every day I write a journal entry.  The thing is that it never usually gets out of my head and onto paper or a computer screen.  And every day, I say the same thing:  I am just waiting for the right event to inspire me to finally write this stuff down.  I wait for the right time, so that I can create that magical chapter one in my life for everybody (or nobody) to read.  Well, I guess the truth is that there is never going to be a clear jump off point.  So you just have to stop one day and create one.  Today is that day for me.  Now I'm not going to pretend that I am profound and wise, but I am attempting to honestly sort through my muddled thoughts, semi-deep one liners, and inability to put life lessons into daily practice.

This week, reality decided to stomp my foot, sucker punch me in the kidneys, and bitch-slap me upside my peanut head.  Going back to work has been hard.  I feel that I am unmotivated, set up for failure, and surrounded by people and situations who are ready to kick my rear end.  Case and point:  visitors at FP today.

Now I refuse to go into any detail (for fear of any readers who may snitch), but I felt beyond disrespected from this afternoon's charades.  Anyone who knows my last relationship knows that I was unfairly taken advantage of and tossed aside.  Fine.  It sucked, but I try to get over it.  So why does that same pathetic individual feel the need to continue to kick dirt into my face?  Listen, buddy, get over your insecurities and leave me the hell alone.  You've already unjustly hurt me, but why continue to belittle my dignity and try to show me up?  Seriously, effe you.

So, here's what I am trying to remind myself.  Every up and down is a teachable moment.  God gives us hard times to teach us discipline.  Parents only discipline their children out of love.  Teach me humility.  When we are grounded, we are a lot safer when we fall because we didn't set our pedestal high enough to do irreparable damage.  I have to remind myself that I don't have all the answers, and I especially don't know what's in store for me in the future.  Certain events in the past few years may seem like tragedies, but I truly believe that we go through things for a purpose.  I do not yet know what's in store for me, but if it's greatness, I most certainly need to experience my bumps in the road to build strength.  Because in the end, only the tough survive.  And damn it, I may need a helmet for my tiny head, but I am ready for the ride.